The State of Hayes Culver is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by the Governor with an iron fist, and notable for its state-planned economy, punitive income tax rates, and restrictive gun laws. The cynical, devout population of 12.229 billion Hayes Culverians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized morass — juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Spirituality, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. The average income tax rate is 77.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Hayes Culverian economy, worth 49.8 trillion betales a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, highly specialized black market in Trout Farming, Basket Weaving, Uranium Mining, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 4,068 betales, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nudity is frowned upon, elections have been outlawed, Hayes Culver has designated Capital Heights as its capital city, and The Governor has just been declared ruler of Hayes Culver in an international press conference. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hayes Culver's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Hayes Culver is ranked 94,677^th in the world and 1^st in Pittsburgh for Safest, scoring 84.9 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.